Sunday, February 3, 2013

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.
Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...
Because it's happening TO YOU.
People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling is love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bothe r (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage! , you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.
Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work,a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.
And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience.. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You20have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the expression "the labor of love."
Because it takes time, effort, and energy . And most importantly, it takes WISDOM . You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...you can "make" love.
Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling .

"No one falls in love by choice, it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance, it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance, it is by choice"

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

New thoughts

So sorry for not blogging for such a long time... I guess for the longest time ever I've been so caught up in my own life... Honestly I dunno what has gotten into me or what has changed me but I guess when I try to focus on God, God is never not there waiting for me...

I guess the 1st turning point is:

1. The Blind Side (A movie)

This movie seriously touched me. It reminded me again that there is more to life than chasing for that perfect job, those perfect grades... I've really been engulfed by the world... by SMU... I need time off... more time to think about my life... how to give my best in school for God, and not for myself, and not for the world.

Well, to backtrack a little to the movie, in case some of you have not watched it. I shall not say too much as well, in case I say too much and spoil the experience of those who are still intending to catch this movie for the first time.

Well basically the part that touched me most was the fact that this Christian family stuck to their principles, lived with the mockery that was given to them, and challenged social stigma. All this trust for a stranger, who had a bad record of leaving his foster families. Also, this family is one that I can relate to. Their children couldn't care less about their comfort, and they took many things for granted. However, somehow, when this family, in particular the mom, decided to take the stranger in, both parties benefited. Their children grew in maturity, and their parents learned to stand up for their Christian principles. More importantly, this family showed how they used their blessings to bless others. It's so unfair that people like us have the right/option to take things for granted whilst there are people out there who have nothing to take granted for, except maybe their own lives. Sigh, I promise to God and I pray and I hope that I will use all the blessings He has given me to bless those around me, and not to benefit myself.

2. Sermons

I need to prepare for Singspiration this Sunday. I thank God for giving me the courage to continue to try to place Him first despite having an inaugural 5 exams this sem. I pray that I will use time wisely and finish my exams. At the same time, I have a good break from the routine of school lessons and have more time to do my QT as well. :)

From John Piper's website,

(http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/sermons/the-word-of-god-living-active-sharp)

The Deceiving Power of Sin

Notice three things here.

In verse 12 the danger day in and day out is that an evil, unbelieving heart would lead us away from God. Unbelief is the issue. The issue is failure to trust God's promises.
Then (in verse 13) notice that something like small groups is essential: "Encourage one another day after day." So you get your small group involved. You need their help. Why?
That's the third thing: the way our hearts become unbelieving (verse 12) is by being "hardened by the deceitfulness of sin" (verse 13). We need help to keep from being deceived by sin. How are we going to be rescued from the deceiving power of sin? How can small groups help? How can we help?
That's what today's text in Hebrews 4:12 is meant to answer. The Word of God is living and active and penetrates to the bottom of our lives and rips the pleasant mask off the ugly face of sin. The only reason anybody sins is because at some level they are (culpably) deceived. They start believing the lies of sin instead of the promises of God.

Sin whispers through the desires of the flesh and the rationalizations of the mind, your only hope of future happiness is to have an abortion. It whispers that you will not have a chance in the future if you don't cheat on this test. It says that you won't be noticed and liked if you don't dress provocatively. It says you will lose the one person who seems to care for you if you don't compromise your sexual standards. It says you won't have job security if you speak up about the dishonest practices at work. It says your life will be wasted in this relationship if you don't get a divorce. It says that only a fool would go on looking weak instead of getting some kind of revenge.

Every one of those statements is a lie. It's what Hebrews 3:13 calls "the deceitfulness of sin." Now those lies sometimes lodge themselves very deep in the heart as thoughts and intentions that seem unshakably true because of the hardness of deception that encloses them like a dark, sealed casket. In that condition unbelief has the upper hand. We are not believing in the promises of God, we are trusting in the promises of sin. And we are in mortal danger of becoming so hard that repentance will become impossible (Hebrews 6:6), and heaven will have been thrown away for the sake of a few fleeting pleasures, like an inheritance sold for a bowl of stew (Hebrews 12:16).

How Will We Escape the Deceit of Sin?

What is our only hope? Our only hope is that there is something sharp enough and powerful enough to penetrate through all the deception and shed light on my thoughts and intentions. And that's what our text is about in Hebrews 4:12. The Word of God is our only hope. The good news of God's promises and the warnings of his judgment are sharp enough and living enough and active enough to penetrate to the bottom of my heart and show me that the lies of sin are indeed lies.

Abortion will not create a wonderful future for me. Neither will cheating, or dressing provocatively, or throwing away my sexual purity, or keeping quiet about dishonesty at work, or divorce, or vengeance. And what rescues me from this deception is the Word of God. The Word of God's promise is like throwing open a great window of bright morning sun on the shiny-back roaches of sin masquerading as satisfying pleasures in our hearts.

In other words, I see Hebrews 4:12 as a tremendous encouragement coming after verse 11. Be diligent to enter God's rest by fighting off the disobedience of unbelief. Why? Because (verse 12) God has given you his good news (verse 2), his promises, his Word to protect you from the deep deceptions of sin that try to harden the heart and lure it away from God and lead it to destruction. Be of good cheer in your battle to believe. Because the Word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword and it will penetrate deeper than any deception of sin has ever gone and reveal what is truly valuable and what is truly worth trusting.

And so we end this message at a point of crisis. You have heard the Word of God. Much has been exposed to your own conscience this morning. And now as verse 13 says, "no one is hidden from God's sight; but all things are open and laid bare before his eyes." His gaze is upon you. What will you do with what he has exposed, and what he now is watching?

I hope the answer is: turn from the deceptive promises of sin, and trust in the all-satisfying promises of God.

I need to turn from the deceptiveness of sin. My heart has been hardened to sin. I've been so numbed to it then I don't even realize the predicament I'm in. Lord, please help me to stay focused on you. And I pray that I can do this with my brothers and sisters in Christ.

3. On Politics

Somehow, I've become more interested in politics. I guess one is Pei En's influence, which led me to taking a module called Economics of Politics. After finishing the course, I learn to appreciate the complexity in politics a little more, and tonight I actually caught a political forum on TV. I was eagerly anticipating to watch it actually after seeing it on an advertisement. Well, the oppositions parties sort of disappointed but I was really quite impressed by the abilities of our Finance Minister, in particular his clarity of thought and sharpness of delivery.

My friend then pasted me a link on someone's view of the PAP and some of the issues that might be less well-known. If you want to you can read it at this website: http://yaevlejunce.wordpress.com/2009/12/12/my-vote-counts-10-reasons-why-i-cannot-vote-for-the-pap-in-the-next-election/ Somehow, this website led me to think about the bigger issues in life.

It has reminded me that life is not that simple. That we should never be complacent about the things happening around us. We are shallow beings. Our knowledge and experiences are limited to 5 senses. We are unable to appreciate the complexities and difficulties going on around us when we do not actually experience them. Typing in front of my laptop and focusing on my blog makes me forget about the unrest in Middle East, the pains in Japan, the problems of Social Security systems in US, the large fiscal debts in Europe, and so on. My exams make me forget about everything else. Lord, please forgive me for my inactions and my sins.

I am really convinced that God wants to use me for something meaningful. I need to stop doing things that are menial, and prepare and hone myself for bigger things to be used by God.

That's all for now... hopefully I can start blogging more :)

Monday, July 26, 2010

Been very long since I last uploaded a post.

Finally managed to find this very good christian website thanks to Ying Qian and Dao Yi.

Haha. okay here it is! http://illbehonest.com/

And watched 2 videos today... hope to encourage all who's in this walk with God, especially the brethrens... and those who have yet to commit their lives to Him... do so today (:

Cheers.



Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Been so long since I last blogged. Well... taking some time off work to just quickly post something that I read on the net.

Been thinking about quite a few issues recently, and I'm having like some concerns for like $$ in the future to meet family needs and all that... been thinking about investing, but haven't found a good reason to start... decided it's about time to get some good information and start pondering... (partially cos the markets are dropping now (my friend sms-ed me to ask me about some stock and if he should start) and it might be a gd time to start seriously considering)

"Location: Investing

Why invest?
by Crown Financial Ministries


God is the perfect partner in any investment program. It is He who supplies all the seed to be planted. We plant it; He multiplies it. So, any investment program ought to be based around multiplying assets that God supplies and returning the bulk of the crop, as pointed out in the parable of the stewards in Luke 19:12-24. The seeds that we retain then bring in a greater harvest the next time. As we show our faithfulness, He will give us even more. Our responsibility is to return it to His work.

Reasons for investing
God's number one prerequisite for investing is always centered on our attitudes. Money can be used for the comfort and convenience of our families. It can be used to provide the needs of others. It can be used to spread the Gospel. Or it can be used for destructive purposes. Money, if misused, as in the case of the rich young ruler recorded in Matthew 19:16-30, can be an object of devotion and idolatry. Love of money has separated families and shattered friendships. Countless marriages have split up over the love of, or the misuse of money. Christians, therefore, must assess why they want to invest and how the surplus from the investments will be used, in the light of God's principles. God is not against prosperity, but He hates evil attitudes that often accompany prosperity. These attitudes include greed, covetousness, and pride. So, since ultimately attitude will determine how an investment surplus is used, it is vital to discover what attitudes God wants us to have.

In addition, there are scripturally sound reasons for investing, and there are unscriptural reasons for investing. If you are investing for the wrong reasons it's like having your ladder leaning against the wrong building. No matter how high you climb, you still end up on the wrong building.

So, first we will evaluate why people invest and accumulate money, and then we'll look at the scripturally sound and unsound reasons for investing.

Why do people invest?

Others advise it. Many people invest simply because someone else advised them to. They don't have any clear personal plans or goals with regard to their investments. According to God's Word, we are to seek good counsel, but we must weigh all counsel received against His Word. Listen, but seek God's direction before taking action.

Envy of others. Many people want to invest and accumulate wealth simply because they envy other people and their successes.

It is a game to them. Many people invest because they consider it to be a competitive game. As such, they often get so wrapped up in the contest that they sacrifice family, friends, or health in order to win the game. They have no particular attachment to the money; it's winning that's important to them.

Self-esteem and ego. Many want to accumulate wealth so that others will envy them. Those who are victims of this motive use their money in an attempt to buy esteem and bolster their pride and ego. “A man's pride will bring him low, but a humble spirit will obtain honor” (Proverbs 29:23).

The love of money. Those who love money will not part with it for any reason. Their lives are characterized by hoarding and abasement. This is a type of idol worship, which separates us from God. First Timothy 6:10, Hebrews 13:5, and Luke 9:25 caution against the love of money.

Protection. Many people accumulate money for protection. This attitude places money as the object of trust and security rather than God.

Slothfulness. Often people don't plan well during the earlier years of their lives and, consequently, when faced with expenses in their middle or later years, they panic and try to generate in five years what they should have saved over the previous 20 years. A regular habit of spending less than you make and saving the difference is the proper investment plan.

A spiritual gift. There is only one reason why God would supply a surplus of wealth to a Christian: so the needs of others can be met. If Christians want God to entrust greater riches to them, they must be found faithful in the smaller amount first (Luke 16:10-11). God promises His blessings to all who freely give and promises His curse on those who hoard, steal, covet, or idolize.
What are the scripturally sound and unsound reasons for investing? There are three scripturally sound reasons for investing.

Multiply to give more. The parable of the talents recorded in Luke 19:12-26 tells us that God entrusts wealth to some of His stewards so that it will be available to Him at a later date. The management of the wealth requires that it be invested or multiplied.

Meet future family needs. The indication throughout God's Word is that the heads of families should provide for their own (1 Timothy 5:8). Good planning requires laying aside some of the surplus for future needs.

Further the Gospel and fund special needs. This type of giving is necessary to maintain and promote the Gospel. If the church is ever to break out of the borrowing habit, Christians who invest must maintain some surpluses and be willing to give to legitimate needs.
There are four unsound reasons for investing.

Greed. Greed is the desire continually to have more and demand only the best (1 Timothy 6:9).

Envy. Envy is the desire to achieve based on other people's successes (Psalm 73:3).

Pride. Pride is the desire to be elevated because of material achievements (1 Timothy 6:17).

Ignorance. Ignorance is following the counsel of other misguided people because of lack of discernment (Proverbs 14:7).
Once a Christian has accepted the purpose of investing—to serve God better—the crucial decision is how much to invest. This decision must be made after much prayer. In addition, a plan for the use and the distribution of the potential surplus must be made before the money becomes available. Set goals and pray about each goal before attempting to do any investing. If motives are anything but biblical, it would be better to give the money away rather than to risk losing something far more important than money—a relationship with the Lord.

Conclusion
Being rich or being poor is a matter of providence in God's will, and He will give us only what we are capable of handling. The Christian's responsibility is awesome and sobering. God, in His eternal plan, has decided to use us to supply and to fund His work. One day we must all stand before God and give an account of what we have done with His resources. Why does God provide an accumulation of wealth from investing? So His people can exercise giving in order to meet the needs of those who cannot provide for themselves."

Source:http://www.crown.org/LIBRARY/ViewArticle.aspx?ArticleId=598

This article pretty much sums up quite a few key points, though I'm not too sure if the parable of the talents was literally referring to investing in wealth, or just generally talking about using our gifts from God to reap fruits for His purposes.
got to check it out.

but yeah, i have some good guidelines to think about this investing now! definitely have some good intentions, but can't deny that the temptation to value $$ is there, and the competition and pride thing probably is as well... soooo... yeah... will pray about it more!

Thursday, March 25, 2010

On this day, this time, I might live to painfully remember what Isaac always say, "Words are powerful..."

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Biblical Dating: Just Friends - http://www.boundless.org/2005/articles/a0001475.cfm

Biblical Dating: Are You Ready to Date? - http://www.boundless.org/2005/articles/a0001449.cfm

Brother, You're Like a Six - http://www.boundless.org/2005/articles/a0001371.cfm

BA: Stuck in the "Just Friends" Zone - http://www.boundless.org/2005/answers/a0001464.cfm

Sermon - Cultivating Healthy Marriage - http://sermons2.redeemer.com/sermons/cultivating-healthy-marriage

articles that a christian brother in SMU shared to me... it has been very helpful for me, and I hope it will be for you too...

God is good... all the time...

Sunday, January 31, 2010



AF video... (: